it is quite sad, that all we like to do is to complicate things where things should not be complicated, and to simplify things which are not supposed to be simplified. where things are supposed to be taken with awe, we shldn't act in a disenchanted fashion. love, nature, life, faith, marriage, compassion, beauty, and even God. instead, we have wasted time on building our ego, adorning ourselves externally, and attracting attention to something which is not God.

Romans 1:20-23 "For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse. For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Claiming to be wise, they became fools, and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man and birds and animals and creeping things."

about 1 wk before i fly. thank God for his faithfulness so far. seeing too many things over the past half yr. from the painful and unhappy and i walked into the valley of the shadow of death (Ps 23:4), but now wad i see is much revival and much lesson on the 2 great commandments (Matt 22:37-40). same situation the whole time - back urself up wif the Word of God, and let the Holy Spirit lead, and seek first the kingdom of God. those who know me will know, last time kns self-seeking, holier-than-thou, sibei zhuai. now everyone says a different thing, i leave it to whoever who sees to judge for urself. i not important. He must increase i must decrease (John 3:30)

to ppl who are gonna stay in s'pore, alot of my friends tell me this yr jubilee yr for s'pore, and there is collective vision rgding s'pore becoming antioch of asia. pray that God will move in u, and on ur part, be willing to let God move in u. be a Jesus! remember the great commission, yet dun forget the great commandments too. that is how Jesus was so effective.

u see in s'pore, we seem so good, but actually we are as dead as Sardis. so "strengthen what remains", and i believe we will get somewhere cos God knows our hearts. the harvest is plenty, but the labourers are not keeping up wif the supply of harvest. go all out guys, and sustain the fire even after the jubilee. we will see what God wants to do. i sense that God is coming quickly. let's live by the word continually.

see in my church, i was thinking all is bad. but while that is happening, i thank God for a deaconness in my life who told me, go and talk to more ppl than just sit in my well and look at the sky, thinking that all is going wrong in the church. so out there i went in my church, asking aunties and uncles what they thought. all of them, i see love, i see love of God. and from there on, i started to love ppl in my church even more. eventually now, i smell an awakening, and that continued into my church small little chinese congregation (God added 10 ppl to our 30+ regulars) and then now the younger peeps around my age oso start to see God's work too. focus on God, not ppl. please. and continue, i m sure God will show sth. so remember this:

Rev 3:1-6 "And to the angel of the church in Sardis write: ‘The words of him who has the seven spirits of God and the seven stars.
‘I know your works. You have the reputation of being alive, but you are dead. Wake up, and strengthen what remains and is about to die, for I have not found your works complete in the sight of my God. Remember, then, what you received and heard. Keep it, and repent. If you will not wake up, I will come like a thief, and you will not know at what hour I will come against you. Yet you have still a few names in Sardis, people who have not soiled their garments, and they will walk with me in white, for they are worthy. The one who conquers will be clothed thus in white garments, and I will never blot his name out of the book of life. I will confess his name before my Father and before his angels. He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.’

i dun claim to b God. neither do i play God.

but in my own limitedness, i honestly just want to say... i still love u today. and i will continue to love u. i know i did not put it across in the wisest/most beautiful/most romantic way or some way which is up to ur own taste and preferences.

but i just want to tell u, i will continue to put myself out there for u. not cos i need something back in return, not that i want to act as if i m so noble or what shit. no.

if it is an outpouring from God that really wants to come out of me to u, i just want u to know that God loves u, and that is more important. and that is the greatest gift that you have alr received.

so... i guess... wad i do is inconsequential, but i rly hope that u love God back too. and stop looking at just my actions or others, but turn it back to God and thank him for it...

if God today wants me to walk that hard path to learn what is love, where love = not expecting, i don't mind walking that over and over, and telling u that i love u, with no expectations. u will continue to b special to ppl, and more importantly, u r special to God =)))

will b praying.

1 Peter 5:8 - Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.
Ephesians 6:12 - For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.
1 John 3:10 By this it is evident who are the children of God, and who are the children of the devil: whoever does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is the one who does not love his brother.

everything can be used by the devil to scam us over and over. when we r down, God is actually with us, and the only thing that tries to condemn us is our own sin. when we r feeling good, God has blessed instead of using this as a time to boast of only our own efforts.

when we fall short of His standards, God may us signs to turn us back to Himself, rather than He is actively condemning u. (so today if u hear, do not harden ur heart to God.)

when we are walking in the light, stay there, hang in there. abide in Him. the deceiver is always around to tell u that u are getting everything wrong. but rly, heck that deceiver and turn to God.

father i thank you today, for making today, for sustaining me today... for the blessings you have given, for the common grace you have provided to all of us so that we can be reconciled with your holy nature. i love you father, for you have first loved me.

i pray today, that u remind me you have victory over sin, that u remind me while i am weak, you made me strong by your righteousness, that u remind me i don't have to succumb to my human nature and my weakness, and that i can rely on you again... i need your grace father.

be with me as i walk in this turmoil... remind me of your powers and your mercies. i feel torn apart, and i need you in my life. it is disgusting, it's an irritating feeling, and i know you are with me as i walk this agony.

father, be with her too, as she makes decisions, may she also do things which glorify you and not in a selfish manner. grant her wisdom in this period of time, give her courage to face up to what she needs to. father may you bless her and keep her heart close to you and not be shaken by things happening around.

father forgive me of my sinful nature and my weakness, and let your glory shine through. let not my weakness take over my mind and my body, and let your Spirit be the one that is with me than my own human nature. i want to abide in your love, and not in what i want carnally. father may you work mightily. Deliver me out of this. hear my cry, and give me comfort, and send your spirit to guard my heart and mind against the work of my flesh and weakness and the devil.

i pray in your son's most precious and holy name.

just remember a few things ok:

1) God loves u
2) there r ppl who care 4 u...

and i love u too. but... i rly can't say it... i dowan it to affect u... i know u hav many more things to do for God, and i too hav other responsibilities at hand...

but i rly love u too. if u do go with others, just make sure u hav discerned and thought through that decision. i will try not to b jealous... i mean i shldn't even be...

i just feel crazily confused... it's so not human to react this way.

God... help me. teach me to love, and remind me of ur love, and rly give me strength and courage to face this situation... i know it's not all bad when i focus on ur glory, but when my own fleshly desires kick in it's rly not fun. honestly, it is not. and i wanna say... deliver me from temptation too God.

mayb i shld start to find that line between loving others... yet at same time keep some room for self-preservation

idc if i am weak. God will make me strong. but i do want to make a few things heard in this private public space. HAHA. wells. if u know what i mean.

if i love u and yet u accepted someone else, of course it's gonna be disgusting to watch this whole process. but in time to come i believe... i gonna witness it. 我不喜欢承认我放得下。but i just feel... idk. i need to let go. i need to stop being jealous. it is burning me. and God is burning me... in a weird sanctification.

i rly duno wad to say, God is giving us such ambivalent directions... and burning the jealousy.

i m rly torn. i m scared. n i really need to lean on God's perfect love. i don't know. i m disgusted... really fearful of the future... i hav cap to maintain, my parent's mood, my future rgding r'ships.... help me God... help me...

God i trust in ur promises... yet... i m stupidly faithless, n i m so weak, n ur glory is really the end point. i want to be there... n provide me with the peace i need. i cry to u. honestly, i m fucked up. i really want to learn to love... yet the process to learn to love, is so hard...i m gonna die of liver cancer soon learning how to do it....

God lets just say this. u know why i like her... and u have been purifying it day by day. n in all honesty, u know. yes she's pretty, her personality is likeable. but no shit, u hav shown me sth. so what? i like her, those are just bonus factors. but truth is, clearly... she really seeks u as well. that's crazy, i never liked a girl who fits such description. i was more bothered by figure and behaviour last time. n now, i m more bothered by the convictions of the other party, and also whether this person prefers christ over secular issues.

Sometimes i wish u were more accessbile n closer... May God guide us in this situation... For separate concerns... God teach us too as we leave our lives in ur hands, seemingly in separate directions, show us wads happening.
------------------
Religiosity is religiosity. When i believe in God, is not about following rules n creeds n stuff. Is about glorifying God, and being willing to let God lead me in my life, and not living by my own strength, trying to please a tyrant by practicing altruism or what.

Many hav a bad misconception here, and they try to do more n more by themselves without a heart of reliance on God

i'm so sorry but i rly hav to say, i don't know what the world is about anymore.

when we don't put God in the centre, everything else creeps in, like money, like self-centredness, and any other temptations, and esp the devil's works.

why are we spending time trying to create the ideas of happiness, the ideas of peace/harmony, the ideas of being in authority just because we hold a niche/more money/more fame?

i don't understand these worldly behaviours v much. i find it hard to fit in all of a sudden.

and worse still, i know my responsibilities, but i feel a little lost in the world. like, i just wanna slp and do nothing about it and look at God.

but i know i need the strength back. i hope, i pray, God be with me... rly, i need the strength back.

may God work through me... let me see you... let me see your grace and your providence again... it's humbling, it's disgusting on my self-centred and self-sufficient attitude, but i really need God's strength to live everyday.

i'm getting incoherent and i should be. cos i within myself... i m messy alr. God take control...

and i oso need to work and let God guide me in getting a grip on myself. and really pray i recover soon.

sometimes i feel a burning desire to say... shall we display God together? shall we let God work through us? for one another's sanctification?

i honestly don't know.

but anw, now is a shag period of time, thanks to the lack of forecasting and solid tasking, so everything is so fluid. we are the officer as well as the specialist as well as the executors in all areas.

we are taken for granted, we have no say, and who bothers? no one gives a shit about others realities. and, how about, do u even know the realities? u are not a leader. u are just a task person. u have not fully appreciated the intricacies of organization.

i feel totally like officer on man mode haha...

honestly.

in any case i oso feel quite emo, cos my belvedere is going bad a little too fast for my preference... nooooo...

so i hear u support LGBT, u support rights for whatever oppressed good, and u allow ppl to go for pre-marital sex, adultery etc?

sure, all these things can be done. the word is CAN be done.

should they be done?

another person came up to me to tell me, woots, so shiok, had sex.

sex. so shiok. was it really that fun? haha... from all the reviews i hear, there are too much things going on during sex, esp wrt to the girl's side. the guy's side? on first thought he think he's a hero, on 2nd thought, o siala, how to manage the relationship wif the woman? on girl's side??? hoho... i hav observed that it is tricky on her part. dun play wif it too much tbh.

the end times are near. we will all see more of immorality, we will see the normalizing of sins.

but hey, wad's so surprising? wasn't all these sins normalized once before? HAHA... pls, they say, under the sun there's no new thing. 我见日光之下，所做的都是空虚，都是捕风；已有的事后必再有，已行的事后必再行，日光之下并无新事。

continue to do our part, let's not lose hope, and be the salt for the earth. we are living in shitty times, but it gives us no excuse to behave badly. it is even more excuse to love, and display Christ. let's do it together. in army they say, together we make a difference. 

i m not here to impress u, the one i need to live for is God. not even impress Him, but honestly, to do His will and not my own.

i do not need to act as if i am very loving and caring and helpful and serving the community by going all out into the needy or overseas to help those who are needy there. i m not here to impress ppl by my CV. by always being a helping hand to those around me, encouraging those around me, i am already doing the same.

not that i discount ppl for going, but i guess we cannot discount the small encouragement we give to others.

i tell u, those who went out of their way to impress me, they did not encourage me at all. the ones who actually were more encouraging, were those who were actually around me when i needed them.

God is my boss, that's why I shld do more than what I shld. If God is not my boss, I don't even have to do this much. I can already sit around to enjoy what is already given.

every paragraph for this post shld b taken in isolation.

pray for God to be real in your life. speak to Him. don't debate with me and don't use the arrogance in your intellect. God is a spirit, and we worship Him in spirit. in Jesus is the power to wash away your sins and unrighteousness, it's time to stop living in the shadows of what u cannot do. not by just forgetting them and moving on from them, but with the power that... u know all these sins are already forgiven.

read the Bible, not as another literature book. I appeal to u humbly, pls, give yourself and give God a chance. read it, as if God is speaking to you. God wants to communicate with you. u may think this is some kind of joke, some kind of placebo, some kind of madness, some kind of lunacy, but i tell u, u won't regret this. read it as if God is communicating to you. think of it this way: u read other books, other writers are also trying to communicate sth to u. think less about ur own learning and what u can glean, but think more about what God is trying to tell you through the Bible. and my conclusion - God loves you, and God is faithful to you. He won't let you down. He will put some through the test - thank God for that. it is only the strong that will be put through the test. complain all u wan. i complained. i complained hard. i cried hard. but after the test, u will see more love than u ever have seen.

Can a man carry fire next to his chest
and his clothes not be burned?

i shall admit i hav done that and got burnt.

For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication:

That every one of you should know how to possess his vessel in sanctification and honour;

Not in the lust of concupiscence, even as the Gentiles which know not God:

That no man go beyond and defraud his brother in any matter: because that the Lord is the avenger of all such, as we also have forewarned you and testified.

For God hath not called us unto uncleanness, but unto holiness.

God-willing, i shall walk in holiness and not in shamefulness.

enough of that. time to leave all the past behind, even if i see the repeat of the similar situations, let's not jump into it. those who hath ears let him hear. and i shall hear... i hav been burnt so much.

even if the bloody temptation is right around the corner again, i shall resist it. do the right thing in God's eyes. do the right thing. be guided by the Spirit and not my own lustful spirit. watch it. 

人与人之间的关系不是银行也不是股票，别整天想你放了多少钱，在对的时机投资，一定会有收回。别神经，别放弃治疗。。。

so over a few hours time, God has worked.

there is a way to overcome ur wants and ur sinful nature.

there is strength to do it.

and God will make a way, His grace is sufficient for us. let's not be greedy to wait for more and tempt God.

wells, i guess, God help me to accept the truth and ending once again.

honouring God hasn't been easy.

to honour u, was my duty. i guess i did it, but i wonder whether u ever done so in return.

i got piece of shit.

but really, i think i rather continue to honour u and honour God. i think it's greater that way. i hav nothing to say, but if u dun honour ur heart and u want to up stakes, solve the fucking problem for yourself. at some time of time it'd burn.

when it fucking burns, i oso can't do anything.

as for me and my house, i choose to serve God. i can serve one another seriously, but this time round to serve, my job is really not to be active. but to just be passive. i love to b involved, as per any other normal person.

curbing my desires, crucifying my flesh over the past half sem was painful.

no results to speak of. other than God is working.

i was ready to put my life down, wait for the right time, to not overstep boundaries, to respect decisions and stands. hence i waited, did not do anything..

alas, more things appeared than i wld hav expected. God is coming to test.

test, in the most epic of ways. it's bloody pain.

how about, fucking pain. i'm feeling the same numbness as before. the same situation. all these negative thoughts, they are coming around again. it's disgusting me, it is screwing around with me.

God help me, let me accept the facts, let me accept Your will as the only perfect will... help me to live not for my own desires but to desire Your plan and to love those around me, to care for those around me also.

really... i hav nth more to say, i duno what i'm thinking, and i duno what i shld b doing. i'm just as lost as ancient times, i need a restart. may God guide again and be faithful. i know He will.

A man has the courage to have uncomfortable conversations. He is honest with his intentions and lets people know where they stand. A boy avoids. He ignores confrontation or any serious talks about feelings. Instead of dealing with a situation, he runs away from it or creates drama or excuses to mask the fact he’s not that into you or a relationship.

A man is afraid of rejection but will put himself out there anyway. A boy is afraid of rejection and acts passive so that his pride and ego won’t ever get too banged up.

wells, not my own saying, quoted from this blog called justmytype.

but i always wonder, then, is the other party a woman. is she woman enough? if she is not woman enough, my job is to protect her heart.

u gotta know, how fucking shag it means to protect someone's heart? u know what is protecting?

u know how disgusting it is when i see, ppl in less than (perceived) preferred situations, yet sticking it out? do u know how disgusting it is when i see others being offended, affected negatively, seeing them in distress, in confusion?

yes i used to b a fuck up to make ppl confused so as to gain some self-edifying victory. now, enough, when i go over to the other side and i want to care not on myself, i see all these issues. ppl defrauding others for own sake. for own pleasure. 

i crossed line that i shldn't hav crossed last time before, i know what is happening. i can put myself out there. pardon me, i m still selfish, i m counting costs. because there is price to pay. there is price to pay for being the protector.

there may be no reward for doing the right thing, as per normal. yes, mayb i shld stop looking at reward. fuck myself, go do the right thing la. the right thing usually no fucking reward one. but just do it lah.

God help me.

sometimes... feeling insecure.

where is your love? where is your maturity? where is your decorum?

now i understand. ya i know it's not the time. but it isn't fair, when we just live behind facades... we dowan to see each other truly... and force one another to live in illusion. it's not very responsible when we do that.

ps bro. bua the car... paint scrape... no beep from the reverse thingy oso fml.

all the lessons learnt.... must be from sth epic and scarring then i will learn one. other than that like i won't learn any lesson. fuck.

not fun lei.

are we earnestly looking for truth, cold hard truth written in love which appears as unappealing and absurd? or have we grown accustomed wif the trends of the world, and we are just seeking the experience of love, appeal to emotion and allowing wad we can see and feel guide us? i find it increasingly hard to tell the truth. but i must love to continue to tell the truth.

the devil operations are smart, it is using a whole bunch of confusion techniques to let ppl think they are already saved. honestly, if i were back in my old self, i'll say, i can't fuck u in the face, but in time i don't have to fight the war with u. God has already won it for us. in war time, my language is not always beautiful.

kns. what shall be my course of operations next? how do we correct ppl? how do we shine? fuck my life. so shag.

mayb a dose of trust God will work out for me.

i always wonder, if u are the more discerning party, are u supposed to bring ppl to ur understanding or are you supposed to descend to the level of others so as to understand them? it has always been harder to do the latter while maintaining ur own understanding.

pardon me if i sound like a bitch, but honestly, sometimes it gets hard. it gets real hard. it gets fucking hard to do the right thing, to maintain ur level of integrity while trying to understand others. it is so easy to descend and join everyone else in the lack of understanding.

it is so tempting, to fit in with the crowd well knowing that your ideas are actually for the greater benefit.

i tink i m weird.

things that i can't give 100% in, i don't go in. those that i do, i give 101%, and that somehow turns ppl off.

maybe i need to learn some stuff from other ppl. a chemical engineer-turned-VWO person once said "you have to get down to where they are and work with them from where they are, and not pull them up to ur level because they just don't operate at such levels yet."

empathize, and not expect.

i hav high self-expectation and that may hav unintentionally been dumped on others. i tink it's time... on top of my listening, on top of my effort to engage ppl... have to oso use even more energy to understand ppl.

i feel a little shag out... i never done such things such as understanding others b4. all i did last time was to cross my finger to be that person that everyone would listen to. now, i reverse. i want to listen to ppl, i m interested in what they have.

headache. headache.

my duty is to lead, to excel and to overcome.

overcome ur wants.

i hav no idea.

我心里有惧怕。我怕这次又是我的罪性在引导我的行为，我的举止，我的想法。我怕这次的迷恋又是为了自己的私欲而不是为了他人着想。

maybe not the time yet. i don't want to cause the wrong thoughts. i don't want to cause the misunderstandings. hence, i don't feel like acting.

maybe it's not the time. i should not act out of my own accord. but i shld act so as not to stumble others, so as not to wrong the other person.

conclusion i should not.

but still the flip side tells me, if i don't act, later go wif wrong person. den how? fucked alr? cannot rite?

mayb just shuddup la. shuddup and see. u can't control wad's ahead. just chill the fuck out. and don't create anymore chaos and sin anymore. that time burn not only oil tio burn burn until can't even see mother or father anymore. dafuq. u don't want to burn in that situation again.

so uncertain. God help me? i hav no idea. am i supposed to see it as temptation? or chance.

i don't know at all.

maybe by testing the faith? the confession of the Spirit? i don't bloody know.

wad if i tell u i kinda wanna just waste time staring at u? HAHA

but... there's an art. the same thing by 2 persons can be viewed as either sweet or creepy.

sick of this shit.

idk. mayb it's not the time, yet if it's not the time, whence cometh the time?

father in heaven,

great are you, and you are worthy to be praised... father forgive me. forgive my lack of understanding. forgive my haughtiness. forgive me, for i have been boastful and proud.

my overestimation of my abilities... have been a stumbling block to many. lord, forgive my sins. forgive me of the times that I wanted my way.

lord, let me be guided by your spirit. let me follow you. lord, let your will be done through me, and not my will all the time. lord, let me serve you with a pure heart, with no evil intent, with no boastful intent.

guide my heart, let me speak not of my selfishness, let me speak not from my pride, my need to cover my face.

but let me speak your goodness, let me speak whatever that is edifying, let me speak whatever that is pleasing in your sight, and not what i please.

lord, remind me from your word too. from proverbs 3:5-6 "trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thy own understanding. in all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths." not my path be trodden, but lord, guide my path.

bless me, according to your will and not according to my selfish wants. lord, keep my heart from evil, especially evil intents and temptations. continue to humble me Lord, let me see that you are greater, and your will is sovereign over me, over all things of this material world.

in Jesus name i pray to you Lord, amen.

---------------

有时在堕落到一个地步的时候，我们才会明白、了解一些真理。

realisations after being in utown for a while and NUS and FoE of NUS.

1) people are lazy, they hate to read emails.
2) punctuality is a virtue that is not valued at all.
3) too many people, "having a form of godliness, yet denying [God's] power"
4) people aren't as discerning as they seem.
5) people who seem repressed making a stand is a hero; people who stand up for current existing trend (be it morally correct/right/sensible) are bigots, idiots, self-centred etc.
6) mugging seems to be immoral when others mug, but when they themselves mug it's go "get back" at others.

so this is what we see. haha

take a look back into the archives of this blog... i was depraved, sex-craving, sex-hungry, self-righteous. basically shitty.

today... God help me. God, guide me to be a better person to shine for u in this world.

why do i study the bible? for my self-righteousness and ego and knowledge? or shldn't it be to promote God's glory in humility and love and grace?

God, help the world... so many are learning... yet with knowledge... so many are puffed up... i was there as well. but it's hard to tell others... it's hard to tell others that knowledge when used wrongly it's like power: absolute knowledge corrupts too. it's far too easy to abuse it for manipulation, for control, to strike fear, to make others idolise u...

and we do know those who use God's name for their own purposes... it's everywhere... the world is about God, and not about using his name for selfish purposes...

what's the end of human? to glorify God.

humble me, so that i can shine in darkness... point people to God...

i'm enjoying myself too much in the past year eh.

enjoying my ego for so long, enjoying my pride for so long, tasting the fullness of it...

够了。你在这样下去，死路一条。谁会来接受你？

其实。。。自己心里也是够乱。

整天遇到诱惑。。。一次又一次烦恼。。。在周围都是陷阱。一定得记得靠主的力量来度过。。。

不容易，不容易。想来想去，每次就觉得为什么很少人接受我？还是我整天在跟不同的人作对？？可能。整天只想竞争。整天要赢。整天要胜过他人，包容不了别人。

原来如此。写来写去可能这里有抓到问题。。。

求上帝帮助我。整天跟着别人笑笑，其实我里面真的是太多放不下的怨、愁、嫉、傲。。。

愚昧人行愚妄事，行了又行，就如狗转过来吃他所吐的.

够了。别做狗了。当以基督的心为心。。。不要为了虚荣做东西。不要为了无意的事情烦恼。。。不可贪求情欲也不能被所看见的诱惑。。。

我穿過的拖鞋　和專用的茶杯　都沾上薄薄的灰
像葉子的書籤　還是歪歪斜斜　被夾在二十八頁
我不該赴這場約　不該貪看這點點細節
不敢去挖掘　這是遺忘還是眷戀

其實愛過境遷　關心想多一點　又怕我不知深淺
還是有些界限　隔在我們之間　彼此都難以跨越
想問你新的愛戀　是否有你想要的完美
一切的一切　是否都能如你所願

除了隱藏感覺　除了繼續寒暄　還有什麼可以解圍
如果因為從前　讓心模糊曖昧　寧可永遠不要見面
你有你的世界　我將會在你的記憶裡慢慢沉澱
不能是情人　就讓思念　自生自滅

so insulting.

if u r uninterested to see from other's perspective, it show sth about u. 

there are some i agree they hav high level of arrogance. but in spite of this, they still help people who disagree with them. 

if today there are people who disagree with u, and he gets into a fatal situation, u telling me u will just continue to whack him right? i definitely hope not. 

树人不是玩游戏。

make time for God, God will work through u. how many a time i have watched, so many godly people, once they found a tempting, seemingly harmless yet vain pursuit... they fall away from God.

they turn away. they go for all these temptations instead of serving God.

they start to forget God, they focus on the vain. vain includes spending time with people... while never doing things edifying/glorifying to God together. 

i don't expect people to whole day be coming together to share Christ's goodness. but if when gathered... we never ever talked about God's blessings upon us... God's direction for ourselves... mayb even the grace of God to the unsaved... looks like it is time to think again how much time we are spending there.

a lot like my bowling. i like to think there's no great result. because there is little opportunity about God in bowling. mayb i shld even quit it. i wonder.

testify about God. it's good. Hebrews 4:12-13 - For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.

they who are scared or disgusted by God's word... hav things to hide. they dont' want to face God. they prefer he's not there. they see that the world is more beautiful without God. they think a world with God stifles their creativity, their space, their freedom. 

is this life about ourselves? what if i told u... this life is not about humans? this life is about obedience to God.

pardon the lack of humility, but honestly. let's face it. if i am a church leader, it does not mean i necessarily have much  more biblical and doctrinal knowledge than another church member. u'll never know,  a random church member may be a person equipped with more biblical knowledge than the pastor.

expectations vs reality. HAHA...

我是不是有点神经？

die la. whole world will bloody laugh at me. let's keep this a secret. i shall only appear until i see some seafood. else... just lie low... lie low... keep quiet...

but like... wan to tell ppl. yet can't sae. machiam i visit prostitute.

又不是说见不得人。只是超级干怪懒而已。

sometimes i find it funny.

the whole organisation can bow down to a person they deem as either valuable or rare.

instead of someone who is truly capable.

少了你，每天都是冬天而已。

everyday. every bloody day. easy to say, hard to do.