well i do know from some sources that humans are communal beings.
but i tink i hav faced certain situations where humans become anti-communal. and sometimes humans become this way when they are in a situation where they can build on a certain communal relationship. why so?
i'd guess sometimes rational thought overrides the emotional connection we may seek, or wad we may put it as animal instincts.
for instance, i hav in fact chosen not to associate myself with certain people whom i tink are very self-absorbed and/or self-centred. i know it is not very nice of me to do so, but i'm not sure of the real reason why i'm doing so. i mean these people if you have a personal relationship with them usually won't be bad to u (although i do know some of these are really bad cases, will backstab u at any opportunity). and of course, one can build a good relationship with them, whether friends or some good working relation. but sometimes we choose not to.
and i'd postulate that we do not choose to maintain a candid relationship with them is because we are worried of the"societal" consequences. meaning, if i were to go around with this person, i'd be seen in this light. for example, i don't enjoy hanging around with extremely irresponsible for the very reason that i do not want to be assumed as some irresponsible person. similarly, some people may not want to go around with me because of the fear of being associated as some coffee-drinking, direct remark making person. for the very reason that they being around wif me, will lead to people generalising them as me. ditto for people choosing not to maintain a relationship with someone wif "undesirable" characteristics.
but in light of such selfish considerations, i'd sae: juz go ahead and be associate with them la. that applies to me oso. on the assumption that these people really have no evil intentions to stab u, that's self-explanatory, that person won't do u any harm. and moreover one more friend means one less potential enemy.
so my qn to myself will be, why nid to hide certain dealings i hav wif others under the carpet? quite lame sia. but on the same note, no point "publicising" it. i mean show off for wad? i got alot of dealings and links arh? really sia. if i really had links, i'd be doing business in china and india and africa and drinking money and oil.
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