marathon. sian.

as the world start to make its stamp on wad i see, i feel very disappointed. and at many a time, i feel like going to the dark side. juz become a merry-maker and hav fun and hav sex and hav wine. eat drink be merry. but is that right? it seems right to the world. i hate being holier than thou. but sorry. i hav to sae the world isn't right in this case.

do we have to behave like an idiot to b cool? apparently not. tink about the bunch of ppl who are highly sought after. they dun behave like idiots. they either behave like nuts and promiscuous, else they are nerds and geeks. and which apparently hav the better viewpoints? i will leave to ppl to comment.

but i hav to sae the world's moral standards hav significantly taken a dip. sex is viewed as free. once upon a time, it was sacred and reserved for marriage, heterosexually. now there's zoophilia, homophilia, botanophilia. disappointing. but again, it's not for me to sae. AGAIN. the world rules u alot.

but sorry world. i stand firm to my beliefs. i may make adjustments to "blend in" so that i won't stand out too much like a dick. but i will not turn into a fucker juz to become like the bunch of apparently cool bastards. yes. these ppl are aptly put as bastards - they dun seem to have parents to teach them right and wrong. i hate insulting them, because it make me seem i want to criticise their upbringing since 养不教，父之过. but i feel sad for their parents - most of them want their children to be wonderful people. not wonderful fuckers. but because of wadeva reasons and circumstances, they submit to wad is trendy, wad is sleazy and sexy.

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no point. seriously, no point. juz live my stupid and nerdy and geeky lifeless life. if ppl wan to see it as nerdy and geeky and lifeless is wad i doing, as i like to sae, so be it. does ur opinion matter to me much? i can sae, my opinion of u doesn't affect u. why shld i allow ur opinions to affect me? haha. it's so fun to play wif absolutism and relativism.

midnite toking sai liao. mai gong jiao huay liao.

wow. quite an unbelievable nite 2nite. wif 866 + 50hdcp = 916 series over 5 games, i can get 3rd in a 13-man comp. hahahahahhaha.

on a pragmatic/secular standpoint, i will thank my coach, bowling buddies, bowling alley staff (for talking crap wif me), and my gym training for getting here.

on religious standpoint, i will thank god. i mean obviously since saya christian. for sustaining me and blessing me with many abilities and an able body. and keeping me free of injury though i exert considerably on my body.

but 2nite, quite alot of flush pockets, luckily there were some kicks of 10-pin by 6-pin. and one memorable ball muz b the 4-6-7-10 which dropped and then left only 4. fun bun.

anw i fluffed the last game 141. thanks to last frame stroke of genius. cld hav been 177 if i struck out last frame. but fml slipped twice for both shots, and got -8. became 141.

after this, back to work. morning proj/gym, afternoon bowl/sth else, nite???? probably project again. and then some bad news, e.g. someone reminding me of hols package.

si ginna. 2day muz hav been lousiest day bowling. like nub liddat.

but good try again. pick 2-4-8-10

oo. things hav taken a change. many are going right now instead of left.

let's hope my ball will work out wonderfully.

anw a cake from breadtalk is really good name man. it's called angel and devil. sth liddat. sibei fit cos the chocolate si dark choc. and i dun like bitter dark choc. nehneh. the white sponge cake nice den jiak tio dark choc i will sian.

many tings are not going right. they are going left.

maybe i shld follow the trend and go left too.

lao ma arh. 为何命这么奇怪？？ hahahhaha.

why do so many people go for win-lose? if u gained at the expense of someone else, is it a good idea? e.g. i dun share wif u a certain efficient method of doing something. den we do this activity. i turned out to be faster and took less time, and the boss gave me more money and gave u less. there is this gap of money created between us. in addition to the previous gap of knowledge. then because of this, the boss we are working for gets lower output. all lose. but marginally u can consider i won. because i had more money and i worked for less time.

why nt choose the win win situation? by making some compromises or being helpful, everyone may be better off. but unfortunately, we live in a weird place.

when u compromise, a million people will ask u, u so good, why u compromise wif a nub/idiot/lousy person? is it for political reason? 当心人，你们真是烦死人啦。那些做好人的，必须怀疑吗？除非这个人是混江湖，说话三分真七分假，我不认为我们得怀疑特别友善的人。你去怀疑好人，你自己生活难过而已，也可能使别人难受，在你面前感得非常不自在。

maybe i'm being superficial. but many a time the superficial is the truth, but ppl dowan to believe it and try to make things deep. bad for health. tink too much will die one.

on a skeptical thinking note. rather than optimistic from my previous writing.

even if u try to compromise at times, peace can't be made. why? there are ppl who look too deep, and can't accept the surface which many a time is the absolute truth. u make peace wif such ppl, they will sae. this guy has political agenda. this guy wants to suck my money. this guy wants to plp.

sure u can think this way. i duno. life is juz probably abit more miserable when u try to b wary of ppl who are not evil and they do not hav any motive to make peace other than trying to make peace. HAHA.

they say, u define yourself.

i sae, fk u. are u sure u define yourself? HAHA. more like, ppl perceive who u are and then u hav to sae jtb and live wif wad they perceive who u are. that's too bad. the world is bad. and once u cannot accept the world will never go the way u want it to, hahhahhahaha. u will lose. cos ppl will take advantage of u, sae u stupid, sae u blur, sae u're a dick. while u hope the world will be a place, filled with wonderful ppl and everyone lives in peace.

sure we can live in peace. very easy. if everyone were to show more tolerance, more acceptance and learn to make compromises. i believe in compromises, tolerance. why? cos this is the way to live a life, where ppl u see are friends and there are less enemies. u may think this is a shit hypothesis and that i do not think this way. i sae, fine. go perceive wad u wan. hopefully, soon u will find that the best way to go is to learn to make peace and be friends with everyone.

the world can be a better place, if everyone helps each other. even if there are differences. it's the differences that ppl are unwilling to resolve OR PUT ASIDE. yes. put aside. u may not have to resolve it. u can put it aside. BUT i can confidently tell u many are unable to even put aside differences. ignore it for a moment and life goes on. difficult? yes to those bastards who can't seem to understand what is a simple compromise.

they say, 忍一时风平浪静。how true is that. i tell ppl, 冤冤相报何时了？usually after i'm pist, i will convince myself to make peace, whether silently or openly, wif the other guy. why? see ppl happy isn't that better than see one more guy buay song u? heh. if everyone can start being less unhappy with another... that's a good step. to having more harmony around.